Jan 18, 20233 min read

Is Opposite-Sex Friendship Bound to be Sexual? | Can A Men & Women Be Friends?

Time and time again the adage is reiterated that " a boy and a girl can never be friends". It is a universal part of our culture, our stories, cinema, gossips. The core part of the bias is based on the fact that any sort of gender diversity friendship is bound to get sexual or matrimonial eventually.

The reason lies historically as traditional culture has always segregated men from the women except for familial, sexual or reproductive purposes. The sphere of the men and the women were bifurcated by a thick line and who tried to cross the line was shamed, exiled or shot down with violence.

Imagine the life of a boy, fifty or a hundred years ago - birth, an all-boys school, all-boys college, get a job arranged marriage…. death. It was also the same for a woman. They were more scared of having male friends or any association with anyone with a penis, except her family members or husband, because of social stigma.

The statement of the topic is the result of the fight between the old mindset and the new age girl-boy friendships. The male-female friendship is not encouraged or accepted by even the younger generations.

The peer group constantly mocks the boy and the girl by saying they are more than just friends or by saying that they are hiding their relationship. Also, in the case of monogamous relationships, the partner might feel jealous or made to feel jealous, if his or her partner has a close friend or best friend of the opposite sex.

Reason Behind It

In past parents or culture does not approve of heterosexual friendships because of multiple reasons. Firstly, slut-shaming is very prevalent in many parts of world. So a girl seen publicly with multiple boys will cause social embarrassment, which will eventually hinder her matrimonial prospects.

Secondly, many societies does not really appreciate their offspring choosing their own partners. So men-women friendships or any kind of intermingling between the sexes is an opportunity for the youth to make mistakes. Thus, it can not be accepted.

Then, there is a reason regarding the safety of the girl child, as the crimes against women increase rapidly. Even a woman or her family is bound to feel anxious if she is in a company where the women are outnumbered by the men. The saying is a casually put forth hindrance to girl-boy friendships, propagated by society.

The equality among the genders used to be terrible, once upon a time, not too far ago. Times are changing and statements of these type are failing attempts to stop the change. The border dividing the genders is gradually washing away.

The gender roles and rules are gradually becoming flexible and hopefully, soon we will be able to break free from the shackles of our past. One day, we hope, gender to be an insignificant part of one's identity. You can be anything you want, befriends without anyone you want without feeling guilty.

Let’s not pollute the bond a girl and boy can have with our narrow mentality. Friendship is a friendship and not some gender issue. Let’s start a Liberal Society!